Bugging out

Lately, the boys and I have had more offers to pet enormous hissing cockroaches than we can possibly accept.

In my desperate attempt to entertain young males in the late summer, we’ve been visiting far too many museums and bug zoos. And meanwhile, I know as a fact that I’ve murdered several Manhattan bugs that were at least as big as these pampered display roaches, though I’m not sure if they hissed, since I was too busy scraping them off the floor.

Yes, The Elder is at that age where you really don’t want to know what you’ll find in his pockets next. I feel like I’m in a living “Leave it to Beaver” exhibit: Weird glass-rock shards, shells, bottle caps, Checkers, crow feathers that will be Exhibit A in the investigation of the next bird flu pandemic, and frighteningly sticky novelty toys. And, of course, I have a car with a hat full of acorns. Of course. Of course.

There’s a snail living in my kitchen these days, but it was invited in and even has been indulged with its own condo … a plastic container from Petco that was a must after the cheapo plastic side dish thingy I gave my son was regularly being opened up on my couch. Snail trails on our precious milk-stained microfiber? Thank you, no.

Forget what the cat dragged in; ask what your little human is trying to smuggle in now.–Jillian O’Connor

Do you live with a child obsessed with bugs and slugs? Are you finding live creatures you’d prefer to see dead taken in as your pets? Please, do share!

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