Public library, den of iniquity

The Elder loves the downtown library, but learned early that it was the place where he could play Clifford the Big Red Dog and Bob the Builder video games.

Yes, Seattle’s amazing downtown library, designed by Rem Koolhaas and another guy, and oohed and aahed at by millions of tourists a year, is really just a place to watch TV-in-disguise for toddlers.

Now The Younger has discovered the DVD section of our neighborhood branch. It’s the place where you get to move stacks and stacks of Christmas Elmo DVDs  — any time of year! — before you start screaming to leave and go get a purple doughnut.

Thankfully, neither has yet become acquainted with other activity in the stacks, namely creepy grownups publicly watching extreme close-ups of penetration. Yes, that kind.

One local mother had to deal with this lately, when her young kids were exposed to some graphic footage while they were visiting the “stacks.” The librarians told her they were not in the business of censoring patrons’ reading or viewing materials:

Yes, censorship is bad, but since when are people allowed to watch any old footage of anything anywhere? We have zoning for theaters that show porn. Are you telling me they can’t zone the public porn-watchers to a library peep room in the back? And ask for a few extra quarters, while they’re at it?

And since we’re on the topic of censorship, when was the last time anyone saw a Penthouse, Jugs or High School Fist-F&%*ing 4 on the magazine stands at their local branch?

Yeah, it’s been a while, huh? Because it doesn’t happen. But we never considered that to be censorship, did we?